I don't like the city. Plain and simple. I wish to be free in the country where neighbors aren't right next door and the chance of hitting a deer is high. I miss my home and the people who are there. My family is so important to me and I didn't realize it until I moved so far away. I want to be a part of my family again and become a part of the family I married into. I have a freaking sister (in-law) and I want to get to do the things with her that sisters get to do! Aaron has a brother (in-law) and I know they both want to do stuff together. This is one of the many reasons we're moving home.
I have known since my junior year of high school that God was calling me into ministry, but it took me a few strikes to discover the path He has provided for me, but I think I've found it. I should have listened from the beginning, I should always listen from the beginning, but I keep getting lost. I think I'm going to get it right this time, my eyes are pointed upward and I'm looking to God entirely this time. I don't know if I'll get all the money I need, but I have the faith that God is calling me to a different place; a place that will embrace the person God made me to be...even if I am a bit different. I don't have a church, or a clear plan, or even a home denomination; but I know God wants me to be a minister. Maybe I'm not the ideal candidate, but I know that I will only ever feel as though I'm answering God's calling if I am a minister. Now I haven't specificed what kind of minister, because I'm not sure where I'll be. Maybe I'll be a youth pastor, or an outreach minister, maybe I will end up being a senior pastor, or maybe I'll find my ministry in mission work. I just don't know, but that's where I'm finding all the beauty. The unknown is something I've learned to thrive off of because it brings such an excitement to life. God has it all planned out, and I have to take the first steps, but He is always right beside me holding my hand. What a wonderful God He is :)
I don't know where I'll be next May, but I have an amazing man by my side who is willing to follow God's plan for our lives.
-Ashley
P.S. Yes I use the masculine pronoun for God, I apologize, but God is God and HE is who I can relate to.
2 comments:
:)
i feel like that about pgh sometimes.
i think you are doing the absolute right thing about moving home. i know you will be much happier, not just for being closer to family but being at a better school setting that will allow you to thrive as a minister. even if everything doesn't fall into place until the last minute, it's all for the best :) plus you'll be closer to me ;-) hehe! i love you and i know you and aaron are making the right decision about moving back to ohio! talk to you soon :)
<3 holly
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